You want to end the conversation on your terms and get back to her at a later date. Remember, this is not meant to be a process where you accomplish everything you want to accomplish in a matter of hours. Rather, you accomplish it in a matter of weeks or months but trust me when I say if you are patient the strategies outlined on this page can be extremely effective.
my boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 6 years ,almost evrytime i visit him, hes always playing games with his phone and when i tell him that its wrong and i dont like it ,he will stop and the following day he does the same thing playing games again in my presence. i recently told him again and he said we need space because i was angry and shouting at him .its been two weeks now ,we not talking to each other .so i just want to know what should i do in this regard?
I met a guy, we went on a few amazing dates, he bought me gifts, was always super keen to see me, (i was away a lot so we only saw each other 5 times), then, out of nowhere bam! he starts to pull away. Only i didn’t realise this is what’s happening. The last time i saw him, him was kind of distant, but he stayed over and went to work the next day. I knew he was busy, so i didn’t expect to hear from him, plus it was two days before Christmas. When he hadn’t responded to my text i sent a cheeky one joking about where he’d been and he said he’d been super busy and that he had the flu. The texts got less frequent over Christmas and new year and everything i suggested meeting up, he ignore the request, but replied in the usual manor.
Until recently , I contact him again hoping to win him back another time(for godsake I dunno why after all the scolding from him to me and disrespecting me).Thinking I have grow to be more confident.Sadly, I made the mistake again falling in the booty call. I regret so much. What should I do? I keep choosing him over and over again. Although he said he dont want my love .Yet I keep going back to him.
My bf of five months is going thru a divorce. He broke up with me saying he could fall in love with me so easily but can't let himself and needs time to heal from his marriage. It is an increasingly messy divorce. He messaged the next day saying he has set up counselling and will sort everything out and then again to say he loved every minute with me and is sorry he's not himself right now. I told him to take the time he needs to heal and have been responding to his texts but am finding this all very had and confusing....
I want you to imagine something for a moment. Lets say that you and your ex girlfriend are texting pretty frequently. The two of you are responding at a pretty good clip (meaning both of you are responding to one another.) I think in this case when she has already proven that she is responding to you in a frequent manner you don’t have to pay as much attention to neutral responses if they are in the middle of a texting conversation.
We spent that summer together inseperable after that. At the end of the summer he told me he loves me. In that moment I truly forgave him and saw that he had made the mistake out of fear, and open wounds from his last (and only) real relationship… I realized the poor guy had never even experienced true partnership and love… I was excited to show him how a real partnership can be, and how lovable he is.
You should investigate whether he is not being loving or interested, or if he’s just not doing that in the way that you expect or are used to. You may have unspoken expectations or fantasies of what a relationship should look like, and your projections are getting in the way of appreciating the good relationship you actually have. It sounds like you might have different love languages as well, where you need a lot of verbal affirmation and maybe that’s not his strong suit. That is something you can discuss with him and ask for more of. You can tell him what’s working for you and what’s not, or that you’re unsure whether he’s into you romantically despite all the evidence, and try to hear and understand where he is coming from.
These men who pull away have an avoidant attachment style. Read ‘Attached’ by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller and ‘avoidant, bad boyfriends’ by Jeb Kinnison. After reading these I realised that I’d been unhappily married for over twenty years to an avoidant man. I’ve since met someone with a secure attachment style and the difference is night and day. Unfortunately most secure men pair off youngish so the dating pool is disproportionately full of avoidant men. DO NOT MARRY one you will be miserable.
my boyfriend and I have been together for 4 yrs. we had our ups and downs but one day things fell extremely out of place. I was at home when I received a call from his closest friend. I learned that my boyfriend was seen with another woman. I asked his friend to see what happens and a few minutes later I received a picture. I was completely shocked and broken. I knew that females were constantly on his social media I wondered if 4 years of being with me had been relevant to my boyfriend. I was hurt and asked his friend to keep an eye on him. The outings became frequent. I was fuming on the inside but I did not show it, nor did I ask him. I decided to confront my boyfriend about these events. I asked him if he felt like he should have told me. Out of my anger I told him he could go with the other woman. It took me a while to hear what he had wanted to say. My boyfriend worked part time as a waiter and so did the girl. I showed him the pictures and waited for an answer. He explained to me that they had gone out only to eat. I believed him but I didn’t quite understand why the outings were so frequent. He expressed his feeling of not telling me sooner and making me jump to conclusions. They had gone out to grab lunch and he explained the girl knew he was in a relationship. After a few weeks, the girl had left the job to work in a different restaurant. I felt angry at myself for yelling and misunderstanding him. He had apologized for not telling me sooner and creating a big problem. We have now established rules for our relationship. We had to communicate with each other and if an even had occurred whatever it may be, we will always talk about it. Communication and forgiveness is key. Know your partner. Me and my boyfriend have since grown closer. He and his friend do not talk as much, that loss has made me and him realize that a relationship is truly meant for 2 and their can never be a third person. To everyone who is in or was in a situation like ours I hope our experience has helped you grow near. Communicate always and be happy!
Our third attempt—and, you guessed it, the ensuing breakup—was kind of a glitch in the space-time continuum. It was 2009, and at this point I’d realized Mary was not an easy person to please. I coasted through the relationship, and she called me out where other girls I’d been with brushed off my repeated bad behavior. Our second breakup had reinforced the notion that no relationship comes easy and you have to put in the work, but I still sucked.
8 months now, we normally live together but he’s away sometimes to take care of the kids for like a week every month which no problem for me. He agreed that moving back to that location is good for the kids education but for her he’s not sure. However, my concern is that he now has to be away to that new location that his ex and kids will move to (it’s also his hometown), to help on finding the apartment and prepare for schooling.
my boyfriend and I have been together for 4 yrs. we had our ups and downs but one day things fell extremely out of place. I was at home when I received a call from his closest friend. I learned that my boyfriend was seen with another woman. I asked his friend to see what happens and a few minutes later I received a picture. I was completely shocked and broken. I knew that females were constantly on his social media I wondered if 4 years of being with me had been relevant to my boyfriend. I was hurt and asked his friend to keep an eye on him. The outings became frequent. I was fuming on the inside but I did not show it, nor did I ask him. I decided to confront my boyfriend about these events. I asked him if he felt like he should have told me. Out of my anger I told him he could go with the other woman. It took me a while to hear what he had wanted to say. My boyfriend worked part time as a waiter and so did the girl. I showed him the pictures and waited for an answer. He explained to me that they had gone out only to eat. I believed him but I didn’t quite understand why the outings were so frequent. He expressed his feeling of not telling me sooner and making me jump to conclusions. They had gone out to grab lunch and he explained the girl knew he was in a relationship. After a few weeks, the girl had left the job to work in a different restaurant. I felt angry at myself for yelling and misunderstanding him. He had apologized for not telling me sooner and creating a big problem. We have now established rules for our relationship. We had to communicate with each other and if an even had occurred whatever it may be, we will always talk about it. Communication and forgiveness is key. Know your partner. Me and my boyfriend have since grown closer. He and his friend do not talk as much, that loss has made me and him realize that a relationship is truly meant for 2 and their can never be a third person. To everyone who is in or was in a situation like ours I hope our experience has helped you grow near. Communicate always and be happy!
If you do it properly, using a text message to get your ex back could prove to be successful. Ideally, it should be used in addition to traditional methods of getting back together. A text at the right time could be a plus when you’re taking the necessary steps to once again win the heart of your ex, but just a text alone will be unlikely to do the trick.

Take responsibility for your mistakes. Avoid making excuses, blaming your partner, or dismissing the affair as “a one-time thing.” In order to ask for forgiveness and begin moving on you need to take ownership of your infidelity. By taking a good, hard look at yourself you can eventually realize what made you decide to cheat and find ways to avoid making the same mistake.[8]
Realize when you and your partner’s plans no longer mesh. Couples that once had perfect chemistry can run into trouble when life-goals and missions collide. If one person, for example, wants to go back to grad school while the other wants to travel the world, one person might feel slighted or cheated no matter which choice you go with. If you are constantly fighting or drifting apart because you have different dreams, it may be time to pursue your goals on your own.[13]
I spent 6 years with my ex. We were young when we got together and we weren’t good at resolving conflict. But I truly believe we loved each other and that he is the right person for me. We both had a habit of ‘pulling away’. Push, pull, if it wasn’t him, it was me. By the end of it, it was dramatic. It was traumatic for me and him too because we didn’t know how to work it out. Since then we’ve both tried seeing other people. But somehow after 9 months we ended up back spending time together. Getting to know each other again. We started to get close… I never pressured him to be with me but I do love him. I’ve tried to be a lot more understanding of his space. Even his friends have said – ‘this is the best you guys have ever been’… But then shortly after he told me his friend had commented on our ‘changed friendship’ and how close we were getting, he attacked me saying I was getting too comfortable. I was so confused because he had been asking me to stay over and he said he was enjoying his time hanging out. That’s what we established it was. We’ve never put a label on anything and have been free to live our separate lives because of what we have been through there was no use rushing anything even a friendship. I was happy with that and I thought he was too.
All anyone really wants is to feel OK, and most of us don’t. When a woman worries and needs constant reassurance, it comes from feeling from “I am not OK” and the feeling beneath that is fear. What makes it so destructive is that it’s not an overwhelming, gripping fear; it’s a vague feeling of unease. It’s so quiet and subtle you may not even realize it’s there. You know how sometimes you’ll go to take a sip of water and you literally can’t stop chugging? You didn’t even realize you were thirsty, it’s only when you begin to quench the silent thirst that you realize how potent it was. That’s kind of what’s at play here.
After a breakup, your ex will have one essential need: space. I know that I often repeat this fact, but I always receive numerous testimonies (feel free to leave your comment as well at the end of this article) in which my readers state that they realized that they were way too present with their ex, and that it was detrimental to their chances of getting back together.
Forgive each other. This can be the hardest part of mending a relationship, but also the most crucial. Forgiveness releases pent up anger, pain, and emotions so that they don’t come back later in life, sabotaging all the progress you’ve made. Remember that no one is perfect, and without forgiveness, there wouldn't be a single working relationship on the planet.[6]
I am engaged to a man that I love with all of my heart. He went through a very difficult phase in his life, that changed him totally. He flirted with my best friend and my sister, but denies it. I caught him watching pornography, and he did try to deny it, but eventually confessed. Then we moved to another city and started a business together, and I thought he will show me the love and affection that he used to, but he doesnt and because of this we always end up fighting. I am not blind for his faults, but I love him so much. I have been fighting for this relationship for over a year. When is it time to give up and just move on??? 

I was clingy, had low self esteem, needy and jealous. The break up was shocking, he took a week and a half to tell me if he wanted space or if he wanted a break up. He was chatting with an 18 year old. He was telling me he doesn't love me anymore and when he hug me he said he wish he could feel by there is nothing, he withdrew from me emotionally 2 months before we broke up. When I was packing his stuff I found something he wrote that he didn't find me attractive. After the break up I was trying to convince him and did testing terrorism until he said to text him only when it's business related. So did one week no contact and called to talk to him about the outstanding bill I was still upset and sent a text to apologize. He called next day and he was upset and sent a text apologizing. I did 2 weeks no contact and called yesterday since he been telling ppl that I wasn't paying him attention and also thinks I do by love him. So I called and ask if we can meet weekend to talk and he said yes. He still have stuff at my place and he coming to pick some up. Today I went to his work to get my keys from him because he still had my keys. He couldn't look at me but did when he hand me my keys, I was acting happy. He said so whenever I needn't get something from the house inbred to contact you and I replied yes I am paying the rent and so I went and havnt made contact however he said he will come weekend. My ex came over for some of his stuff was amazed how the house looked, I did some rearranging. He said twice that the house looks nice and that I looked happy and then stated that he was probably the one holding me back. He said this about 2 times, the second time he said it I ask why he is saying something like that and he said he said he know perhaps he just feels guilty and so I told him that he wasn't holding me back and then he notice I had a mini burn on my hand and ask me what happened I told him I got burnt from the stove. And so ..
Take time out – stop talking before you start to yell when you’re having a row and you’re becoming over-emotional with frustration, anger, hurt or sadness. You’ll only be digging yourself a bigger hole, having to not only deal with whatever you were arguing about but also with the fall-out of being in a very emotional state. For more information on this, read my article: When couples argue constantly.
Some people try to be there for their ex. They walk their dog, they show up at their door with some gifts, and other things. This hinders your value, and makes them wish you were gone. Aside from cutting off communication, it’s imperative that you are not visible. You cannot be seen by her, by your own doing. This will create value, as absence makes the heart grow fonder. You’ll force her to think about you, and will not let her have control, you’ll be in control.
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